You’ve been considering therapy for awhile and feeling the possibility of being ready to take the plunge.
But you need more info just to be sure. After all, there are so many therapists out there and it’s hard to keep one apart from the other and you want to make sure you’re going to work with someone who is going to get it and help.
You need someone who isn’t going to sugarcoat how awesome, resilient, strong a person you are, but call you out on the bullshit because you’re good at keeping up the appearance that everything is fine.
Honestly, you’re hoping for someone to give you penance, like a Catholic priest handing out “Hail Marys” so you can be forgiven for your sins. But what you actually need is someone who can sit in those shitty feelings, ride the waves of despair, and get to the other side.
This is more than learning the theory of feeling better, but the lab portion: where the messiness happens as you actually practice what’s taught.
What can you expect from individual therapy with me?
If you’re new to therapy, then you might literally not know what to expect. When it comes to individual therapy, in general, it really depends on the therapist you see - which feels like such a lame answer, even if it’s true.
When it comes to individual therapy with me, there are few things that I’m pretty consistent with:
I want to know what you’re wanting to get out of this so I can make sure we’re working and talking about the things that will be most helpful for you.
I’m going to have you practice being more aware of how you’re feeling (mentally, physically, and emotionally), what you’re thinking, and what you’re doing… and you’re going to practice doing it with as little judgments as possible.*
I’m going to have you learn how to tolerate those feelings that cause you so much pain in a way that you’re not adding fuel to the fire.
I’m going to call you out (in a nonjudge-y way) when something doesn’t seem accurate or if you’re being harshly and unconstructively critical of yourself and others.
I’m going to have you practice being gentle and soothing with yourself as well as finding people who can do that for you.
* learning to be less judgemental towards yourself and others is also a skill and takes time.
For the structure of session, it tends to go like this:
Checking in and following up on things we may have talked about. Or we can start on a topic that you feel is important to talk about.
Exploring that topic - this may mean you’re the one doing most of the talking, going on tangents and side quests to fill in the gaps (because it’s important for context). It may also mean I’m interrupting to ask clarifying questions, challenging on certain statements made, or having you check in with yourself to improve feeling connected to your body (instead of staying in your head).
Checking in at the end of session to see how you felt we spent our time (was it helpful? Was it not?).
Thinking of things for you to practice in-between sessions (in a no-pressure way)
What problems do I treat?
Who do I work with?
The problems I tend to treat (not limited to):
Anxiety
Depression
Burn out
Suicidal thoughts
Self-harm
Feeling lost in life or struggling to find meaning
Isolation and loneliness
Self-doubt, struggling with self-worth and self-esteem
Racing thoughts
Trauma
Relationship problems (romantic, working, friendships)
Parenting stress and pressures
Executive functioning skills
Low motivation
This is a general list and does not necessarily mean these are the only people or problems I work with.
Neurodivergent individuals (self-diagnosed, suspecting, diagnosed) - ADHD, Autistic, twice exceptional
People of color
Activists/organizers
Students and academics
Healthcare professionals